Harlequin Rejection Letter

Thank you for your submission to Harlequin Romance.  Unfortunately, we cannot accept your submission.  Some of the incidents in your manuscript do not entirely correspond to the usual standards of the typical Harlequin Romance novel.  Often, in more conventional stories, the central characters have a legitimate job, like "doctor" or "humble tycoon".  Your central character, Ben, despite being "rich like a royal flush" seems to do nothing other than drive around aimlessly and occasionally push someone down the stairs.  It's not quite clear how Ben meets Alison but it seems they are at some kind of illegal dog fight which, to be honest, threw us for a loop.  Also, we think that Alison should charm Ben on the first date by cooking his favourite meal for dinner rather than giving him a "Hot Carl" while he watches Scarface.  We were surprised too that when Ben feels pleasure, you describe his groin as being "hotter than dog shit in a skillet".  This really took us out of the mood and we found it difficult to see the romantic nature of this encounter.  At any rate, while we feel elements of your story show a great deal of creativity (particularly the well drawn illustrations that are currently under investigation) it is just not the right project for us at this time.  Keep reading Harlequin!

Yours truly,
Judy Nightingale