Things I Believe

Yes, cocaine can destroy your life and everything you hold dear.  But at the end of the day, you will still be the loudest and most obnoxious person in the room and no one can ever take that away from you.

Things I Believe

It is not a good idea to play tricks on people when they are on their deathbeds because there is nothing worse than an angry ghost.

Things I Believe

If I were the leader of a country, I would have all my citizens remove their pants and take all their pants from their home and put them in one big communal "safe pants zone" way outside the country, just in case the next leader was crazy and tried to outlaw pants or something.

Things I Believe

I believe that if a clown is really entertaining, we should give him a free kill.